It's bittersweet for sure. As I sat on my work chair, studying for the last final exam as an undergraduate that I
CHOSE to take, I couldn't help reminiscing that it was (almost) exactly two years ago, I was studying for my Mechanics of Materials final when I started
Langit Lazuardi (LL) that two weeks later became the my first published short story.
LL is definitely not the best piece that I've penned down. It doesn't define who I am as a writer, even. But it was one of the first short stories that paved my path to write seriously. It's a love story, and it's not- just like most stories that would follow. And it's certainly not Islamic, has no discourse and was written purely based on human emotions.
Since I mentioned Islamic-inspired literature, I just might as well talk about it a little bit. I've been critiqued a few times for being "not very Islamic." For instance, I always have a female and a male characters (
bukan muhrim and not married), engaging in infused intellectual discussions somewhere, sometimes in places where there is no third person present (except for the devil of course..).
And I have had my female characters wearing
"kebaya pendek dan kain batik Jawa belah selisih." Not to mention
"bertatapan," "mencerlung anak mata" and
"hati berdetak laju tatkala dia tersenyum menggoda begitu."I'm not going to lie. Growing up, I despised
sekolah aliran agama and
tudung labuh. But somehow, I loved the
fardhu 'ain classes that were made compulsory after school by Jabatan Pendidikan Negeri Kelantan back then.
That was probably the start of my personal principles. Not going to religious school, not wearing tudung labuh and not memorizing the verses of The Qur'an at the tip of my tongue do not make me any less than others who do. There was time when I felt inadequate, but I realized that most "religious" people are pretty much
bertaklid buta and suffer from
sindrom muntahan otak anyway, and can't really explain the practicality of Islam very well.
Being abroad, where I am judged from my scarf, made me more aware of the dire need to be able to explain the practicality of Islam to the non-believers. Islam is perfect, we Muslims, all know that. But how well are we doing the necessary work to convey that? Another thing, it is also important to distinguish between "what Islam is" and "what one chooses to do." It avoids confusion, and misconceptions. Trust me.
I have a friend who finally confessed that he's been asking me about Islam just to see how strong my conviction is to my faith. He did this deliberately of course, and at first I thought he was interested in Islam. Apparently, he was just being a "silent" missionary. Thank God for guidance and unwavering faith...
He doesn't care about the verses in the Qur'an because he doesn' know Arabic and he doesn't believe in our Holy Book. Oh yes,
berdakwah is NOT restricted in the comfortable cocoon of
lingkungan usrah sahaja, ok? Welcome to the real world.
So what's a girl to do?
This brings us back about the practicality of Islam. He's a man of logic and science (in other words: a nerd who happens to be an engineer), so instead of just quoting the verses from the Qur'an, I would accompany that with practical analogies and explanations. It's not that hard, honestly, especially when you've been grilled to the roots, you'll be surprised at how much knowledge you retained from those
fardhu 'ain classes 15, 16 years ago...
That is also how I write. Islam is practical to me, and that is the message that I want to convey. Islamic-inspired literature shouldn't be about love only (here comes the argument about love to God, I do not deny that but keep on reading...) but most importantly about substance and knowledge. I don't know about you, but for me there is nothing more romantic than a couple intellectually arguing about the Theory of Evolution over cups of coffee and cranberry juice in their quest for knowledge (read my short story
Mencari Tuhan di Celahan Cambrian) than a man and a woman silently obsessing over each other behind closed curtains.*Puke*
Besides, isn't the quest of knowledge is also for seeking
keredhaan Tuhan?